Wednesday, April 28, 1999
from the Ice Palace in Tampa, Florida


Armageddon opens with IA in there locker room getting ready for tonight's card. A saw is heard cutting a hole in there locker room door. IA members see what is going on but the door is locked. A camera on the outside of the locker shows a forklift blocking the door. A vent is shoved into there locker room. We cut back to the outside camera where a dump truck is backing up near the locker room. The person in the truck dumps his bed of stuff into this vent. We see that the some coming from the vent is cow manure!!! All the room is starting to smell like shit as all the members of IA are locked inside!!

We go into the regular Wednesday Night Armageddon opening and cut to the announce location.

Troy Farina: Welcome to Wednesday Night Armageddon Live from The Ice Palace in Tampa, Florida!!

Bald Crumb: Tonight we start a new era in the UWF as new President Chad Hendricks takes over the UWF. Tonight should be a big night of action so let's get right to the ring for our opening match-up.

{Ring Announcer: Introducing first weighing in at 251lbs. Chaostic!!}

"Just Go" by Staind plays as a returning Chaostic makes his way to the ring.

{Ring Announcer: His opponent weighing in at 310lbs. Siphon X!!!}

"A.D.I.D.A.S." by KoRn plays now as Siphon X comes to the ring.

Choastic doesn't wait for the match to start. Chaostic starts to wail with big forarms and closed fist. The ref tries to break it up, or at least let Siphon completely climb into the ring. He signals for the bell as the match is officially started. Chaostic jumps up with a big DDT! Chaostic Suprized as Siphon get's right up and follows up with his own DDT!!!! Chaostic Head sends shockwaves throught the mat. Siphon then picks up Chaostic and sets him up with a big neckbreaker! Siphon up, and once again delivers another NeckBreaker. Siphon picks up Chaostic and decides to whip him to the ropes, Siphon puts his head down a bit to early, as he recieves a kick, and a big Drop Kick. Chaostic Quickly to the second ropes, FLYING CLOSELINE!!!!! This sends Siphon to the outside. Chaostic recieves cheers from the crowd as they like what they see. Siphon climbs back into the ropes and suprizes Chaostic with a short arm closeline! Chaostic backs into the corner as Siphon closes in. Siphon with a BIG SUPLEX!!!! Siphon off the ropes, BIG CLOSELINE!! Chaostic can't mount any offense as Siphon counters Chaostic attemp of a Single Arm DDT! Siphon picks up Chaostic and applies a Sleeper. Chaostic FADING AWAY!!! The crowd now into this as they cheer for Chaostic. Chaostic Shows some life as Siphon breaks the hold and delivers an elbow to the ribs for good measure. Siphon with a kick to the midsection as Chaostic gets up. Chaostic Whip to the ropes, off the ropes RECIEVES A BIG FLYING CLOSELINE!!!!!!!!!!! Siphon gets cocky and leaves Chaostic alone, big mistake as Chaostic delivers a big SPINING HEEL KICK after an extented time of rest. Cover... 1....2.... NO!!!!!!! Chaostic sets up Siphon for a VERDICT!!!!!!!! HITS IT SQUARELY!!!!!!!! Chaostic NOW SETS HIM OFF FOR THE DROP OFF!!!!!!!!!!! HE HITS IT!!!!!!! COVER!!!!! 1...2...3...! DING DING DING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Troy Farina: Chaostic with a big win in his return to the UWF ring.

Bald Crumb: IA should look into this guy.

Troy Farina: Since when are you IA's talent scout?

Bald Crumb: Since now.

Troy Farina: Let's just move right along into the next match.

{Ring Announcer: The next match at Armageddon is one fall…introducing first weighing in at 190lbs. Koonta Kentei!}

"Dueling Banjos" play as Koonta Kentei makes his way to the ring he rolls in and waits for his opponent.

{Ring Announcer: His opponent making his way to the ring at this time weighing 257lbs. Devilock!!}

"Theme for a Jackal" by Misfits play as Devilock comes out for his debut match.

DevilLock tries to get an advantage with an forarm. He Knocks out KOONTA!! DevilLock starts to laugh out loud as Koonta recouvers from DevilLock's Blow. Koonta trying to mount some can of offense with a low blow to DevilLock. Devil Locks goes down as Koonta gets a hit. He goes balistic! DevilLock gets up and shoves Koonta as he flies to the outside. DevilLock waits for Koonta to get back in as DevilLock does a BaseBall Slide ot the face. Koonta climbs up to the apron, BUT DEVILLOCK KNOCKS HIM OFF and he lands on the SPANISH TABLE!!!!!!! Suprizingly the spanish table doesn't break!! Devil Lock had enough fun and climbs to the outside. DevilLock then throws Koonta in the ring with no effort. DevilLock First, with a GREAT SAMOAN DROP!!!! Then DevilLock sets up for a HUGE BACK TO BACK SUPLEX!!!!! DevilLock then decides for a SIDEWALK SLAM!!!!!!!!! Finally, Devil Lock goes for A BIG SPINE BUSTER!!!!!!!!!! Koonta Is REALLY HURT BAD!!!!! Now Devil Lock sets up for his Finisher!!!!!!Rattfink - Rude Awakening!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Cover, Slow Count. 1..........2..........3.......!!!! DING DING DING!!

Troy Farina: Devilock with a win in his debut match in the UWF.

Bald Crumb: It doesn't mean nothing. All he did was beat Koonta. We all know Koonta sucks!

Troy Farina: Be nice Bald….

"Anthem for the Year 2000" by Silverchair plays as the new President of the company Chad Hendricks comes to the ring he enters the ring wearing a nice designer suit and he grabs a mic.

Chad Hendricks: First I would like to thank you all for coming tonight. Secondly I would like to say how proud I am of Special K, Dub and Dante Burn as all men made it to the 3rd round of the WWC Tourney. Now Dante lost in the 3rd but Dub and Special K are still in this thing. I think all three men should come out here and get a round of applause from you folks.

Dub, Dante Burn and Special K make there way out seperately. Chad raises each one of there hands up indivually.

Chad Hendricks: Damn K you smell like shit…you been bathing with the pigs again?

Special K: HEHEEHE! You think you are mister funny man huh? If you werent the president I would kick your teeth in!!

Dub goes to one corner to give a saulte to the crowd as does Dante. Special K gets a huge grin on his face he walks behind Dub and grabs him and powerbombs him..he rolls out of the ring before Dante sees what has happened. Dante looks on as Special K heads to the back.

Troy Farina: What a ugly scene that turned into Bald.

Bald Crumb: K is the man! Did you see what he did to Dub and he even told off the president!! He rules!

Troy Farina: Big man that Special K is attacking wrestlers from behind.

Bald Crumb: I think it's time for the next match…

Troy Farina: You are right. Let's get to the ring.

{Ring Announcer: Are next match of the evening is one fall with a twenty minute time limit…Making his way to the ring first weighing in at 320lbs… Brahm Steppengeist!!}

"Take It" by KMFDM plays as the big 7' walks out of the locker room and into the ring. He steps over the top rope and waits in the corner.

{Ring Announcer: His opponnent weighing in at 285lbs…Reign!!}

An industrial verison of the Undertakers theme plays as the nearly 7 foot monster makes his way to the ring he steps over the top as the bell sounds.

Reign charges towards Brahm and starts to wail with a FULL BODY PRESS!! Brahm counters Reign onslaught with a big DDT!!! Brahm Now in control slows things down. Brahm picks up Reign and does a spining Body Slam!!! Reign Back now bouncing up and down off the mat. Brahm now starts to stomp away at Reign and ends it with an elbow drop. Brahm Picks up Reign and delivers a big forarm sending him to the corner. Brahm now with a HARD whip to the turnbuckle. Reign can't contain himself in the new corner as he comes out. Brahm charges with a big CLOSELINE!!! Brahm Now whips him towards to ropes, Brahm off the opposite ropes, Ducks the closeline attemp by Reign, Off the ropes DOUBLE CLOSELINE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Brahm and Reign both fall to the ground like bricks!! Reign starts to move first and places a cover. 1....2... NO! Brahm with the shoulder up. Both men now start to stand up. Reign up first and DELIVERS A CHOKE SLAM ON THE 7'4 Brahm!!!!!!!!!!! HOLY CRAP!!!!!! Brahm Feeling the effects. Reign now getting cocky, WHAT THE HELL!!! Brahm Gets up, WRAPS HIS FINGURES AROUND!!!!! UP AND DOWN!!!!!! CHOKESLAM ON Reign!!!!!!! Jeez!!!! Brahm now picks up Reign BIG Body Slam! Reign GETS UP!!!! Turns Brahm around...... BODY SLA!! WAIT!!! TOMBSTONE PILEDRIVER!!!!!!! OH MY GOD!!!! That's Brahm 7'4 MAN!!!! JEEZ!!!!! Reign now getting cocky.... as he posses for the crowd... Brahm starting to move.... Reign now to finish off Brahm approaches Him. WHAT THE HELL!!!! OUT OF NOWHERE SMALL PACKAGE!!!!!!!! Brahm WITH A SMALL PACKAGE!!!!!!!!!! COVER 1...2...3...!!! DING DING DING WHAT AN UPSET!!!!!!!!!

Troy Farina: The bigger man came out on top tonight.

Bald Crumb: Sure did, but next up was supposed to be Smiling Jack in his return match but because of things out of ours hands the match has been cancelled.

Troy Farina: So let's get right into the next match then

{Ring Announcer: Next up is a match for the Tag Team Titles…making there way to the ring first at a total combined weight of 774lbs. The team of Heavy Metal!!!}

"Paranoid" by Black Sabbath plays, and Heavy and Metal walk to the ring. They get a mixed reaction from the crowd.

{Ring Announcer: Now here come the champions! Weighing in at a total combined weight of 436lbs…the UWF World Tag Team Champions!! Alan Frost and Victoria Vixen!!}

The bell sounds, and Vixen and Heavy start it off. Quick side headlock by Vixen and throws Heavy to the ropes. Vixen off the ropes and takes Heavy down with a flying cross body. Vixen up, and pulls Heavy to his feet. She throws him to the corner, and in with an elbow to the head. Vixen with a Russian leg sweep and takes Heavy down. Vixen goes for the cover. The ref counts.... 1 - kickout. Vixen over, and tags in Frost. Frost quickly in with a fury of boots to Heavy. Frost pulls Heavy to his feet and gives him a piledriver. Frost up to the second rope, and down with a knee to Heavy's head. Frost goes for the cover.... 1 - 2 - kickout. Frost gets up, and pulls Heavy up again. Frost throws Heavy to the ropes, and goes for a clothesline. Heavy ducks, and turns and kicks Frost in the gut. Heavy hits Frost with a quick DDT. Both men are down. Heavy slowly over, and makes the tag to Metal. Metal in and hits Frost with a huge flying clothesline as he was getting up. Metal pulls Frost to his feet, and gives him a powerbomb. Metal goes for the cover.... 1 - 2 - kickout. Metal pulls Frost up, and throws him to the ropes. Metal catches Frost with a huge powerslam. Metal for the cover again... 1 - Vixen in for the save. Heavy in as well. Heavy grabs Vixen and throws her to the outside. Heavy to the outside as well. Metal up, and pulls up Frost. Metal raises Frost for a Gorilla press. Frost reverses and grabs Metal from behind and hits a back suplex. Heavy on the outside throws Vixen to the security railing. Heavy goes for a big splash on the railing, and Vixen moves. Heavy hits hard, and falls to the floor. Vixen grabs Heavy, and puts him in a Camel Clutch on the floor. The ref stays with the action inside, as Frost throws Metal to the ropes and hits him with a spinning heel kick. Frost throws Metal into the corner and hits him hard with a shoulder to the gut. Frost grabs the ropes, and drives his shoulder into Metal a few more times. Vixen back up onthe ring, with Heavy on the floor. Frost tags Vixen. Frost raises Metal up in a vertical suplex position, as Vixen climbs the ropes. Vixen off the ropes.... BLOOD CONTRACT! Vixen goes for the pin, as Frost nails Heavy with a baseball slide as he was getting back in the ring. The ref counts... 1 - 2 - 3. Frost rolls Metal to the outside, and then embraces Vixen in the middle of the ring.

Troy Farina: Whoa…the champs with a huge win.

Bald Crumb: You know something? That girl is kinda good

Troy Farina: Kinda? She is awesome!

Bald Crumb: If you say so…next match..

Troy Farina: Ok Next up we have a hardcore title match.

{Ring Announcer: Ladies and Gentlemen the next match up is for the UWF Hardcore title…introducing first weighing in at 235lbs…Scott Easton!}

1,2,3.. Slam by Guttermouth plays, and out walks Scott Easton to the ring.

{Ring Announcer: His opponent the UWF Hardcore Champion!!!! Cykotick!}

Flagpole Sitta by Harvey Danger plays, and out walks the current Hardcore Champion, Cykotick.

Troy Farina: Is it just me or does it smell kind of funky in the ring?

Bald Crumb: Ok you have had your fun now drop it!

Cykotick climbs in the ring, and walks up to the ref, and Scott Easton. He lays the belt on the ground in front of Easton and leaves. WAIT! Easton just clubbed him with the belt! He is clubbing him! Now he is leaving! Cykotick forfeited the title, and Easton destroyed him with it!

Troy Farina: Man, did he just take a beating from sXe. He isn't getting up.

Bald Crumb: Wait, here is Special K, and Bedlam. They are dragging his unconscious body from the ring. Good ole IA, they are there for each other.

Troy Farina: Did you notice that smell…

Bald Crumb: Shut up Troy…just shut up!

Troy Farina: Where is your senes of humor Bald? Wait don't answer that let'se get to the next match…

{Ring Announcer: The next match is for the UWF Americas Title…coming out first weighing in at 320lbs. Highlander!!}

His music comes on but nobody comes out…

{Ring Announcer: While we are wating for Highlander let me bring out the Americas Champion…Bedlam!!}

Butterfly by Weezer plays, and out walks Bedlam, the Americas Champion. he is accompanied by Special K. They both get in the ring.

Highlanders music plays again and this time he comes out he steps into the ring and grabs a mic…

Highlander: Right now my schedule is full of things that I have to deal with before I can really make my full splash so to say into the UWF. I will be back, and when I come back I will be in full force. I will be back, that is a promise.

Troy Farina: He is leaving! What the hell? Bedlam gets the EASY win here.

Bald Crumb: Well, he is lucky, cause Bedlam woulda torn him to pieces.

Troy Farina: Well, we have seen the end to Highlander, as we know it. For now at least. He says he will be back.

Bald Crumb: Ok but its time to go to Alcatraz!!!

Scene cuts to Alcatraz….

SweetTooth is pacing around in a jail cell, waiting...K-Pac runs past a security guard while carrying a duffel bag, but SweetTooth sees him in time and tackles him. SweetTooth with a fury of lefts and rights, but KPac swings his legs up and grabs SweetTooth's neck with his feet, slamming the back of his head into the concrete floor. SweetTooth is dazed and KPac pulls something out of the duffel bag...it's..a... tennis racket! He lobs a hit to the kneecap of SweetTooth. SweetTooth with a hard right forearm, sending K-Pac to the floor. SweetTooth grabs K-Pac's head and DDT on the concrete! K-Pac is drowzy...SweetTooth throws him in the cell and onto the the bed and delivers a piledriver, bending the steel frame and leaving K-Pac in a crumpled mess. SweetTooth starts to make his way out of the cell to leave the prison, but he's stopped by a prison guard in a metermaid outfit? SweetTooth pushes her and she kicks him in the nuts! Wait! Off comes the wig! It's Smiling Jack!! He handcuffs SweetTooth to the bars of the cell door! K-Pac is up and goes over to the duffel bag as he and Smiling Jack filter through it...They begin to beat down on SweetTooth mercilessly, Smiling Jack with a crate, and K-Pac with an Atari Jaguar! K-Pac lifts him up, the handcuffs sliding on the cell bar, SweetTooth's head busted wide open. Smiling Jack grabs him from behind in a dragon sleeper. K-Pac...INSTANT DEATH on SweetTooth! His body goes limp and Smiling Jack just gave him a reverse DDT from the Dragon Sleeper! My God!! SweetTooth isn't moving...he's lucky if he lives through this! The two men laugh at SweetTooth and make their way out of the prison. K-Pac wins! Waldo PacMahon greets both the men outside, and hands a big wad of cash to K-Pac and raises both men's hands. A helicopter lands and flies the men away, meanwhile medical units quickly attend to SweetTooth.

Troy Farina: Simply Amazing!

Bald Crumb: Very gross…I loved it!!!!!!

Troy Farina: A sick, sick man you are.

Troy: Well, it's time, next up is our main event, the Insane Asylum vs. the Insane Asylum, for the heavyweight title, it's Marcus Goldstein vs. Bleeding Romeo! However, we have just received word that the entire Insane Asylum is on their way out here right now!

"Money" by Everlast plays over the speakers and the crowd rises to its feet, cheering. The curtains are ripped open and out walks the UWF Heavyweight Champion, Marcus Goldstein. Beside him is Special K, who is holding a metal briefcase. Behind them are Bedlam and Cykotick and at the back, by himself, is latest IA member Bleeding Romeo. They make their way to the ring and one by one get into the ring. Everyone but the newest member hops up onto a different turnbuckle, and Romeo stands by himself in the middle of the ring. As the cheers die down, they all gather with Romeo in the ring. Marcus motions for a mic.

"Money" Marcus Goldstein: "All right... Time is money, well my time is anyways, so let's get right down to the business at hand... First off, Bleeding Romeo..."

The crowd murmurs in anticipation of the confrontation between the two IA members. Romeo, who had his back to Marcus, turns around and stands nose to nose with him. Neither man is wavering. Still staring into Romeo's eyes, Marcus reaches an arm back towards Special K, who hands him the briefcase. Marcus raises the mic back to his mouth, still looking at Romeo.

"Romeo, you know I respect you, you know I wanted you in the IA, that's why you're here... Now I've got to know just one thing..."

Marcus backs up a couple steps and places the briefcase on the canvas between them. He looks at it, then back up at Romeo.

Troy: What could be in that briefcase? Maybe a payoff of sorts? I wouldn't put that kind of thing past Goldstein!

"Now, are you with us..."

Marcus gestures at the briefcase.

"...or are we going to have to do this the hard way."

Marcus begins to take off his suit jacket. The crowd roars in anticipation, and the other IA members all eye Romeo. Romeo seems to be pondering it over.

Crumb: Just take it! Take the damn money!

Finally, Romeo bends over and picks it up. He nods, smiles, and he and Marcus shake hands. The crowd erupts in boos, mostly because they've been cheated out of a great matchup. Marcus motions for the crowd to calm down.

"Calm down, calm down, I'm not quite done yet. The next person to address is..."

Marcus turns quickly and puts his finger into the chest of Cykotick.

"...you. Now, I know you've got personal problems, and you've got that injury thing, and all that. Really, I'm crying you a river over here. But the fact of the matter is it's hard to climb to the top when we have to carry dead weight with us."

The crowd immediately becomes interested again. Cykotick's face is puzzled, he doesn't know what's going on.

"I know you're confused, so let me just get straight to the point."

At this, Bleeding Romeo swings with the metal briefcase and connects directly on the side of Cykotick's skull. With a sickening crunch he falls to the ground. Other IA members begin to lay the boots, but Marcus stops them, probably because Cykotick is dead enough already. Marcus grabs the mic again and points at the fallen Cykotick.

"Look at you, you say you have personal problems, and then you let a minor injury sideline you indefinitely?

The Insane Asylum consists of only the best, and we settle for nothing less than a 110% effort. If you can't handle our business, then we don't want you involved.

Marcus hands the mic to a giggling Special K.

Special K: "Heheheheheh, you fucking baby, now you have a reason to be on the injured list! Hehehehhehe! Now let's get out of here.

The Insane Asylum rolls out of the ring, except for Marcus Goldstein who walks down the stairs carrying his UWF Heavyweight Championship belt on his left shoulder. They walk back up the aisle and Cykotick is left in the ring, slowly starting to move. Special K runs back into the ring with the Metal briefcase, and puts it on the mat. He lifts up Cykotick, and delivers Shock Therapy onto te Briefcase. He laughs, grabs the briefcase, suddenly a bag has fallen from the rafters and it is on fire!!

Troy: K is stomping the bag to put out the fire!! It was a shit bomb!! He has shit all over his feet!! He is looking around for the person who dropped the bag.

Bald Crumb: This is an outrage...K will get his revenge!!!

Show goes off the air….

Sunday Senseless Violence Card