Sunday April 4, 1999
from The Pit in Albuquerque, New MExico
Tony Farina: Hello ladies and gentlemen and welcome to another edition of Sunday Night Senseless Violence! I am Troy Farina and I'm accompanied by my co-host Bald Crumb.
Bald Crumb: Hows everybody doing?
Troy: Good Bald. Tonight we have a great Main Event that can change the future of the UWF.
Crumb: The winner gets to take the title from Dante Burn at Armageddon!
Troy: With that lets get right to the ring.
Hexum is in the ring and awaiting his opponent.
The Banjos plays and Koonta Kentei makes his way to ringside.
Troy: Hahahhaha!!! Whats this?
Crumb: Koonta is dressed up as Junkyard Dog.
Troy: Geez, this cant get any worse.
Hexum grabs Koonta off the bat and throws him into the ropes. He goes for a clothesline. Koonta ducks and returns with a dropkick. Koonta picks up Hexum. Koonta nails him with left and rights. Oh follows it up with a devistating DDT. Koonta climbs to the top rope. Koonta drops an elbow off the top rope. He's going to the top rope again. Looking for another elbow. He jumps...Hexum moves and Koonta nails hard. Hexum is up and nails Koonta with a piledriver. Picks up Koonta. He just tossed him over the ropes. Koonta gets up. Hexum is outside too. Koonta charges at Hexum going for a flying clothesline. He misses. Koonta just hit the ring post. Hexum takes immediate advantage. He throws Koonta in. Hexum goes for the Hex. Cover...One, Two, Three!!!
Crumb: Mark another lose for Koonta.
Troy: He's gotta win someday.
Crumb: Look its Highlander and he's getting into the ring and stands in the face of Hexum.
Troy: Hexum is looking for the mic.
Hexum: It looks like a Grimm day for UWF!
Troy: Look Hexum and Highlander just shoke hands.
Highlander: Suicide Kings, you said you wanted all challenges. So, heres one for ya. The Grimm v Suicide Kings here next Sunday at Senseless Violence.
Crumb: Wow a new stable has been formed. And already has laid down a challenge.
Troy: I guess we need to wait for Suicide Kings answer, but we need to get back to the ring for the next match.
The church bells begin to chime as Savage makes his way into the ring.
"Anthem for the Year 2000" by Silverchair blares over the PA and Stealth walks down to ringside.
Two big men locking up in this contest...Stealth starts off with a wrist lock, Savage reverses around into an irish whip. Off the ropes now, Savage misses with the clothesline and Stealth levels him with one of his own! Elbow into the chest, early cover by Stealth. Not this early. Stealth backs Savage into the ropes, back body drop! Major hang time on that one! Stealth applying the sharpshooter! Savage clawing for the ropes, smart move there. The referee breaks the hold, Stealth with another Irish Whip---countered, DDT! Out of nowhere! Savage is back in this one, laying those hard lefts into Stealth, and what a haymaker! Stealth goes down! Savage to the second turnbuckle, waiting...Buff Blockbuster! There's a cover! Stealth out at two... Savage going for a powerbomb! This could be it---NO! Stealth blocked it! Scoops Savage up for the Running PowerSlam! What impact! He could pin him right here...no, he's gonna finish him! Can he pick him up? Looks like he can! STEALTH BOMB! Lazy cover, but there's one, two, three!
Troy: Savage wanted Stealth and he got more than expected.
Crumb: Yup he lost...Hahahhaha!
Troy: We have KPac going up against Delirium next.
James Bond Theme plays and KPac makes his way to ringside.
Troy: But look Crumb. He hasnt picked his head up the whole way down to ringside.
"Twist" by Korn plays and Delirium struts his stuff to the ring.
Kpac slides into the ring, Delirium bringing the foot into his side. Kpac having none of it! Insiguri kick! Oh man, right to the back of the head! And Delirium isn't a short man, either. Kpac off the ropes, high cross body block! No cover, oh! Kpac drives the knee down. Sends him in to the corner, and now he's going in for the splash--met with a back elbow! Delirium with an inverted DDT! Now where's he going...Delirium to the outside of the ring, he's got Kpac spread eagled around the ring post! The leg, smashed in! And again! Once more! Kpac's left leg is in bad shape here. Delirium rolls into the ring to break the count, and drags Kpac out with him. Head-first into the guard rail! Kpac reversed the irish whip, and Delirium goes hard into the railing! Side Russian Leg Sweep sends Delirium crashing into the guard rail once more! Now Kpac rolls into the ring to break the count, off the ring apron with a somersault flip! What's this here...he's bring the steel chair into play! No, Delirium with a kick to the gut, and there's a suplex on the outside! Kpac landed on the chair! Delirium now slides Kpac back into the ring, and what's he...he just pulled a table out from beneath the ring! Now that's slid in! Why is the ref allowing this? Kpac slugging it out with Delirium, Delirium pulls off a DDT! Suplex set-up...OH MAN! Kpac landed on the table! He's flat out on it now, Delirium's going to the top rope! Waiting...waiting... Kpac struggling to get up, Delirium goes flying! SANITY TESTER! My God! Through that table! Delirium reaches across for the cover...it's over!
Crumb: Hahahahaha!!! KPac sucks!
Troy: Hey be nice. The man looks depressed enough and you have to give credit to Delirium as well.
Crumb: Whatever, whats next?
Troy: Bedlam and Mad Jungle Pig.
Butterfly by Weezer Plays, and out walks Bedlam. He is walking to the ring, and he has a nervous tick in his neck.
Squealing of pigs comes over the speakers. Mad Jungle Pig does not come out.
Everyone is waiting and the crowd is starting to boo, but nobody is coming out. The music cuts off, and it restarts again. He isn't coming.
Crumb: What the Hell? Where is he?
Troy: I have no idea. Wait, someone is coming down to the ring now. It is Prez Kellen.
Crumb: What the hell does he want? He has a mic.
Kellen: Ladies and Gentleman, I am sorry for this, but Mad Jungle Pig appears to not be here. I have been trying to get in touch with him for the past couple of days, and nothing. But there will be a match tonight. Ref, ring the bell, We are going to count out Mad Jungle Pig.
Troy: Why? Why is he doing this? DING DING DING!!!
Crumb: There is the count. 1...2...3...4...5...6...7...8..9...10! Bedlam just got an EASY victory!
Troy: Well, Bedlam is victorious here, but the Question remains, where is Mad Jungle Pig?
Crumb: I guess we move on to the Four Corners Elimination Match.
Troy: Don't forget the winner gets a shot at the National Title!
Coming down the aisle, one by one, at this time are Rave, Ironman Will Howard, Messiah, and El Diablo Rojo! Should be a fine match! It will be Rave and El Diablo Rojo starting off…they lock up..Rave with a quick hiptoss..Rojo takes a back step…they lock up again..this time it’s Rojo with the hiptoss…he takes a bow, pissing off Rave, who gets up and slaps him….Rojo returns the favor, and then pulls him by the hair to the mat, right in front of the referee! Side headlock by Rojo…Rave grabs the ropes…clean break by Rojo…but he mule kicks Rave right in the face as he backs up! What a cheap shot…now he’s rubbing Rave’s face in the mat…tags in Will Howard, who drops a knee right to the back of Rave….picks him up….snap suplex…..uh oh! He’s climbing the ropes…he dives…The Iron Curtain….1……2….but Rojo makes the save! What the hell was that all about….Rojo tags Howard…Howard gives him an evil look, but allows him back in….Rojo slaps Rave..Rave backs him into the corner….he’s pissed off….damn, Rave’s paintbrushing Rojo in the corner…wait….Messiah slapped Rojo on his shoulder..ref thinks he tagged him….Messiah kicks Rave…Messiah Bottom!!!!! 1…2….3!!!!! There’s one man down, but now Rojo and Messiah are going toe to toe….Rojo with an eye rake…he backs up into the corner…and is forearmed from behind by Will Howard! Messiah drops the HOLY Elbow….damn, he may be out! 1….2...3!!! he got him!!!! Now it’s down to Messiah and Howard…they lock up…go behind by Howard..goes for a back suplex…blocked…reversed by Messiah…abdominal stretch….Howard, fighting to get to the ropes..Messiah won’t let him..wait…Messiah lets him go…kicks him in the chest..Messiah Bottom…NO! Northern Lights Suplex, into a bridge by Howard….1….2….kickout! Howard drops a knee to the forehead of Messiah…now he’s climbing to the top…frog splash….MISSED! Messiah stuck his feet up!!! HOLY Elbow!!!! Messiah Elbow….1…2…3!!!!!!
Troy: Where has that Messiah been?
Crumb: I really dont know, but he even impressed me.
Troy: And we all know thats not easy to do.
Crumb: Travis Monkey is in the ring. For what?
Troy: For an interview with Romeo, so lets go to the ring and get the news.
Monkey: First and Foremost Bleeding Romeo, welcome back to the UWF. Now, the Thing that has been on everybodies mind is, what is your association with the Insane Asylum?
ßleeding Romeo: Hello!!! and thank for that warm welcome of yours. And to answer your question, no one
Monkey: No one? You have no association?
ßleeding Romeo: That's right, I have no association with those looney toons
Monkey: well, Why then, did you return, and Help them in a battle against the Kult?
ßleeding Romeo: I don't know why people are saying that I'm part of IA, I just powerbomb one or two freaks that night
Monkey: well, If I am not mistaken, after you delivered those powerbombs, Special K handed you the mic, why didn't you powerbomb him? And what did you mean when you said, "The Legend Lives On"
ßleeding Romeo: cause ... it is true: The legend lives on... and no one will be able to kill it
Monkey: If I am not mistaken, my Special K killed it before you, well.... Vanished
ßleeding Romeo: Please, he din't killed me or vanished... he just paid me for that loss. on this world, everything has a price
Monkey: He paid you? How much?
ßleeding Romeo: That's not of your business Monkey. let's talk about Romeo been the next World Champ,
Monkey: Alright...You are planning to go after Dante Burn then?
ßleeding Romeo: Nah' Dante Burn sucks I want real competition. Beside, Benny told me that Dante Burn isn't Romeo's quality and Benny always speak out the truth.I love him, of course, as a friend
Monkey: Well, Dante Burn is the Champion... If you are going to be the next heavyweight champion, you are going to have to beat him
ßleeding Romeo: To be the Champion, I don't have to beat the Champion...
Monkey: How do you figure?
ßleeding Romeo: While I was coloring with my crayons the other night, a catharsis came to me and I designed the most explendid plan to extinguish Dante Burn the World Champ
Monkey: Are you going to fill us in on your little plan?
ßleeding Romeo: Of course
Monkey: Well then
ßleeding Romeo: Now?
Monkey: Well, when else would you?
ßleeding Romeo: Hmmmmm ok
(Romeo delivers a vicious clotheline to Travis Monkey, knocking him out. He grabs him and delivers his trademark, the Crying Soul.)
Romeo (scream out loud): Releasing the Insanity!!!
(Romeo takes the already beaten Monkey into a vertical suplex. Romeo starts spinning like a possed man and delivers a spectacular DDT. Romeo walks out of the ring all happy)
Troy: He is out of control, get him out of here.
Crumb: Paramedics are in the ring and carrying Travis out of here.
Troy: I cant even think right now Crumb. Can you take over.
Crumb: Next we have a Hardcore Match between Nuker and Smiling Jack. And the winner faces Blood Angel on Wednesday.
"Eve of Destruction" plays and Nuker, the newcomer that has made alot of waves since being here makes his way into the ring.
"Jacking Man" blares throughout the arena, but there's no sign of Smiling Jack.
Smiling Jack just sneaked up behind Nuker and hit him over the head with a steel rod. The match starts already. i Guess this is a hardcore match with hardcore rules. Smiling Jack takes Nuker and does a ddt onto the steel concrete. Smiling Jack takes a TV and smashes it over the head of nuker. He drags Nuker by the hair. Over to the staff food table. Smiling jack takes a cup and pours some coffee. He is about to throw it into the eyes of Nuker but Nuker comes back with sugar to the eyes. He then throws the coffee in Smiling Jack's eyes and does a suplex onto the table sending the fruit far and snapping the table in two pieces. Smiling Jack is cut open. Nuker takes the coffee maker and drops it onto the head of Smiling Jack. Jack is dazed. Nuker picks up Smiling Jack and brings him to another table. He brings Jack on top and tries to excute a powerbomb onto the table. Smiling Jack blocks. ANd throws Nuker onto the beer table. Nuker just crushed bottle in his back. Nuker is cut by glass. Jack takes a bottle and shoves it in and out of Nuker's mouth and say. Is that good. Nuker takes a ice pick and stabs it at the nuts of Smilng Jack. Jack is screaming in pain. Jack takes a keg and bangs it over the head of Nuker. Nuker is knocked down and is cut open. Smiling Jack starts to take beer and pour it onto Nuker. He takes a beer can that is full and throws it at Nuker's head. Nuker is knocked again. Jack picks him up. He does a samoan drop onto a keg. Nuker's back must hurt bad. Smiling Jack gets ontop of the keg and does an elbow onto Nuker. They both walk towards the stands. Nuker goes for a left hook. Jack dodges and throws a kick to the midsection. He takes a lazer pointer and shines it in the eyes of Nuker. Nuker's left eye is blinded for a moment. Jack then smashes the laser point on Nuker's head. He then takes Nuker and does a neckbreaker off the guard rail. They are taking this into the crowd. A man passes a pop corn box. Jack puts it on the head of nuker. He then does a headbutt. Nuker is down. Nuker gets up. Takes a sign from the crowd and cuts Jack. Wait a minute. That isn't a sign. That is a sheet of metal. Nuker just cut smiling jack across the chest. Nuker goes for the suplex. Reversed. kick to the stomach. Last Laff DDT onto the concrete. The ref counts. 1....2.....3!
Crumb: Smiling Jack has a chance for Blood Angel's hardcore title this Wednesday.
Troy: Look its Blood Angel with, with...oh my god! Klay Scott!!!
Crumb: They just walked by Smiling Jack and Jack is leaving with just a glare at Blood Angel.
Troy: They just hog tied Nuker and stuffed him into a large potato sack.
Crumb: Scott just grabbed the Potato sack and tossed it over his shoulder.
Troy: Where are they going with him?
Crumb: Get a camera to follow them!
Troy: Angel just tossed the sack in back of a Ford Explorer and Klay is driving...Angel in the car now as well.
Crumb: They are leaving with him.
Troy: Whats going on here?
Crumb: I dont know but I wanna see!
Troy: But we cant waste anymore time, we have the National Title on the line.
"Poison" by Alice Cooper blares throughout the arena and Scorpio makes his way to the ring with Five H.A.W.C. members to the ring and two are set up in the rafters with two more sitting in seats at ringside.
"Hardcore" by Sharhead plays and the National Champion Jeff Boyardee makes his way to ringside.
Troy: Jeff sees the HAWC at ringside and is refuses to come to the ring.
Crumb: Here comes Prez Kellen and he's speaking to Jeff about the situation.
Troy: Kellen is now telling the five HAWC members at ringside that they must leave.
Crumb: This is sitting well with Scorpio, but the men are leaving and Jeff now enters the ring.
Troy: Now we are ready to get under way.
The bell sounds...Both men stand face to face...Scorpio just sucker punched Jeff to the chin and he goes down like a sack of bricks...look, Scorpio's glove look loaded, but the ref isnt checking them...Scorpio lifts him up...Snap DDT...and Scorpio makes a cocky cover...One, Two, kickout by Jeff...Scorpio is pissed and locks a head scissor onto Jeff...this is cutting off the circulation to Jeff's head...Scorpio breaks the hold and goes after the leg of Jeff...drops a knee square down on it and gives a quick twist...he is now dragging him to the ropes and drapes Jeff's leg over the ropes...drops not one, but two butt drops onto the leg...the ref pulls him away from Jeff but not for long as he goes in for the attack again...No, thumb to the eye by Jeff and Scorpio backs away...Jeff grabs the ropes and pulls himself to his feet favoring his leg...Scorpio comes back...Jeff with a right hook and another...Scorpio swings, Jeff ducks and then nails Scorpio with an uppercut and Scorpio goes to the ground...Jeff walks off the pain in his leg...he goes back to Scorpio and lifts him to his feet...Death Valley Driver...Cover...One, Two, kickout by Scorpio...Jeff back on the attack with right hands to the head of Scorpio and lifts him up...perfect vertical suplex...not finished with him yet...lifts him for a Powerbomb...No, Scorpio reverses it into a hurricanrana and a Cover...One, Two, kickout by Jeff...Jeff to his feet quickly...Scorpio attempts to get to his feet as well but drop down...to a drop kick to the knee of Jeff knocking him to the ground again...Scorpio leaps to the top rope as Jeff gets to his feet...Venom Strike (Missile Dropkick) by Scorpio...he's not done going back to the top rope...Venom Coil (top rope sunset flip)...Cover by Scorpio...One, Two, kickout by Jeff barely...Scorpio lifts him up...sets him up for a suplex...No, blocked by Jeff and again...Jeff counter with a snap suplex of his own...both men are down...
Troy: Wait look here comes Suicide Kings slowly down to ringside. Remember they arent seeing eye to eye with Jeff as of late.
Jeff drapes the arm over on Scorpio...One, Two, another kickout...Scorpio crawls to the ropes and pulls himself up as Jeff gets up in the middle of the ring...Jeff charges Scorpio with a cross body block, but Scorpio drops to the mat and pulls down the rope and Jeff goes flying outside the ring and onto the cement floor...Scorpio is distracting the ref and Suicide Kings are stomping on Jeff...they back away and Scorpio comes outside...the two members of HAWC in their ringside seats are watching SK closely with Scorpio out there...Scorpio whips Jeff into the guardrail...
Crumb: Wait Troy its Blood Angel and Klay Scott sneaking up behind the two HAWC members at ringside.
Troy: Each one just stuffed a cloth into the HAWC members face and look they are falling unconscious.
Crumb: Must be chloroform!
Troy: The two other HAWC members are rushing into the corridor probably making thier way to ringside.
Crumb: Klay and Angel make there way outta the arena floor.
Outside the ring Scorpio lifts up Jeff and gets ready to use him as a battering ram into the ringpost...Ohhhh, Jeff nails the post head first and is busted open immediately...the ref is now outside and forcing Scorpio back into the ring...this gives Suicide Kings another opening to stomp on Jeff for a few seconds and they toss him back into the ring...Scorpio stands over the top of Jeff, mouthing off and stomping him...Scorpio lifts him to his feet...measures him up...vicious thrust kick...Jeff goes down hard...Scorpio to the top rope...Guillitine leg drop...Jeff moves and Scorpio comes crashes down...both men all are on the mat...
Troy: There is action backstage and we have a camera...the two HAWC members from the upper deck are rushing through the corridor and trying make their way back into the arena..the crowd is thick and they are shoving anyone and everyone out of their way...look its Klay and Angel again them behind them with a Bo Staff and a steel chair...they just tapped the HAWC members with the weapons...they turn and face Klay and Angel...and Klay and Angel just laid them out...No they are making there way back to the through the arena entrance...
Back in the ring...Jeff is the first to his feet...places Scorpio between his legs...tombstone piledriver...he's not done...he's telling everyone its time...he lifts Scorpio up and carries him into the corner...must be time for The Can...No, Suicide Kings are in the ring...Slade grabs Scorpio from Jeff and lays him out with reverse DDT...the ref quickly calls for the bell the disqualifies Jeff...But Suicide Kings want Jeff they have him trapped in the corner and begin beating on him...its Klay and Angel into the ring...Klay nails Slade with Bo Staff and Angel lays out Rex with the steal chair...
Crumb: I guess Scorpio wins the via DQ, but doesnt get the title.
Troy: Its not over look!
Three more HAWC members crawl out from under the ring and jump Klay, Jeff and Blood Angel from behind...Scorpio is up as well and assist in the fight...all seven men are going toe to toe...Albuquerque's finest make there way to the ring and seperate all the men...the police are sticking cuffs on all the men including Suicide Kings and escorting all of them out of arena.
Troy: But look Crumb...Klay Scott sneaked out and made his way backstage.
Crumb: Wow, not much more you can say about all that.
Troy: Due to a supposed virus of Klay Scott in the middle of the week and the current situation, his title defense against The Franchise Micheal Wiley has been postponed till Wednesday and this stip just added...It will be a Triple Threat Weapons Match for the TV Title...Klay Scott defending against Micheal Wiley and Overlord.
Crumb: Good! Blood and Violence.
Troy: Next up the Americas Title is on the line.
"Boogy Woogy Woo" by ICP plays and out walks Sweet Tooth.
"Flagpole Sitta" by Harvey Danger plays and out comes the Americas Champion, along with his Woman, Cykotick.
Cykotick is sliding in the ring, and Sweet Tooth jumps him right away. He is working on his head with kicks and short knee drops. Cykotick is thrashing around like a lunatic, and Tooth just keeps laying the knees into his head. Tooth bends down to pick him up. He is holding him, bent over, and he just puched him right in the back of the head! Cykotick is down, and Sweet Tooth locks on a rear chin lock. he is wrenching back, and Cykotick can't go anywhere. He is trying to reach the ropes. The ref is asking if he gives up. Cykotick isn't answering him! Wait? Tooth is screaming now! Cykotick was grabbing his groin! Tooth lets go, and grabs a hold of his Jewels. Cykotick rolls to the outside, and he is seeking comfort from Krissy. Tooth slides out behind Cykotick, spins him around. CLOWN DROP! he hit his finisher, but he is out on the floor! He is trying to roll him into the ring, but Krissy is holding onto Cykotick's leg. Tooth can't get him in. He looks straight at Krissy, and grabs her by the hair. He throws her into the ring, and he follows her in. She slides herself into te corner, and is shaking her head no. he bends down, and grabs her by the hair. NO! He is going for the Clown Drop! Cykotick ! he just made it in time! He caught him in Mid air, and, Back suplex. Tooth almost broke Krissy's neck, but Cykotick came back with a side suplex to save her! Cykotick is enraged now, and he is kicking Tooth in the ribs. Cykotick bends down, and he lifts him off the ground. He lifts him up for a vertical suplex... Brainbuster! He hit him with it, but he isn't going for a cover. He is lifting him back up. Bends him over... Gut wrench Powerbomb! He walks up behind him, and sits him upright. Sleeper! He has it locked on, and he has scissored his body! I don't think he is going anywhere now! The ref is checking to make sure it isn't a choke. He is raising his arm, 1...2...NO! He keeps it up, but he can't get out of it. TYhe arm is just straight up in the air, and Tooth is trying to roll onto his stomach. YES! He did, and he is lifting up himself and Cykotick onto his back. He is climbing to the second rope! Cykotick just unwrapped his legs. NO! Reverse DDT from the second rope! He covers him, 1...2...Foot on the rope! Tooth is still alive in this one. Cykotick can't believe it, and Toth is struggling to even move. Cykoick lifts him up, and he signals for Shock Therapy. He lifts him up, and Tooth flipped right over top! roll up, 1...2...3!
Troy: Tooth Wins, we have a New Americas Champion! Cykotick can't Believe it! he is up, and he has the new Champion... Shock Therapy!
Crumb: Here comes Bedlam and Money out now.
Money slides into the ring as Cykotick lays the boots down on him. Bedlam slides in a table. And another one! Money is setting up the tables Bedlam stands on one, and Cykotick lifts him on it. Sedative through the table! Sweet Tooth is almost dead! Bedlam is going to the outside now, and he is getting another table! What the hell! Cykotick has Sweet Tooth on his shoulders agin, in position for Shock Therapy. He is climbing up to the second rope! SHOCK THERAPY FROM THE MIDDLE ROPE! Cykotick and Money lift the limp carcus of Sweet Tooth of the floor, and they pick him up like a Gorilla press slam. NO! Out of the ring through the table! Money rolls out, and he reaches into his pockets. He pull sout handfuls of pennies! He is pouring them all in his mouth!
Troy: We need help in there and now!!!
Crumb: Why this is great.
Troy: Finally here comes the security and all the members of Insane Asylum are leaving the ring side area.
Crumb: Boooooo!!! They werent done. Hahahhahah!!!
Troy: Just shut up! Syndicate of Terror will be defending the Tag Titles next.
Crumb: Doesnt Klay still have the Overlords Title?
Troy: There go the lights...it must be time for the tag champions, the Syndicate of Terror....Here comes Overlord.....where the hell is Shadow? Overlord's calling for the mic.
Crumb: What's this all about?
Overlord: Well, well, well. Guess what UWF Fans? Tonight, you can consider yourselves, the luckiest fans in the world. Tonight you will witness the greatest event to EVER take place in the UWF's short, but proud history. Lets take a look.
(The big screen shows Klay Scott being viciously brutalized by what appears to be Overlord and a masked man. Overlord nails Scott repeatedly in the throat with nunchucks, and when the other man is given the signal, he chokes him into unconsciousness, then grabs Overlord's missing tag team title belt.)
Overlord: Now, I know you are all wondering who the mystery man is, so I'll keep you in suspense no longer. Here he comes, the second member of the World tag team champions, along with myself, here is Alan Frost!!!
(Frost walks out, with the rest of the Kindred, to a silent reaction....then suddenly..the fans start to clap....with each passing second, the applause gets louder and louder....by the time they hit the ring...the electricity in the building is so thick, you could cut it with a knife...)
Frost: Tonight, both the Syndicate and the Kindred are being buried in the annals of time. We have united, and from this day forth, we are one, and we shall be known as Kindred:Syndicate of Terror....Beware....from this day forth we will be the judges, we will be the jury, and we will be the hangmen of the UWF....your titles are no longer safe, your homes are no longer safe, your daughters are no longer safe, and this world is no longer safe, because on Sunday night, April 4th, your worst nightmare just because a reality....
(The Kindred shake hands with the Overlord, and one by one the Syndicate come out and do the same....Shadow hands over his belt to Alan Frost, and the lights go out...with a piano instrumental of November Rain playing..when they come back on...the entire group has vanished....)
Troy: Never expected them to join up.
Crumb: I wonder whats going on here with all these weird things and people joining together.
Troy: But it is time for our long awaited Main Event. With three of the top talents in UWF.
"Dragula" by Rob Zombie pays and out walks CWolvie.
"Pay The Man" by Offspring Plays and out walks Chris Hassert. He climbs into the ring, and goes over to talk with CWolvie.
"Money" by Everlast plays and out walks the Owner of the Insane Asylum, Money Marcus Goldstein. He waits on the outside of the ring for the bell to ring.
DING DING DING!!! Money Slides into the ring, and he gets rushed by both members of the Kult. They stomp him on the ground. CWolvie just Punched Hassert in the face. Hassert and CWolvie are battling it out now. Money Crawls over into the middle of the ring, and he gets up. Money runs over, and he Nails a double clotesline! Hassert over the top and to the floor! CWolvie is in the coerner. Money grabs him, picks him up... Tree of Woe. he is stomping on CWolvies face! again! Hassert is on the outside, and he has a chair! he is up on the apron, and he just raked Money's eyes. lays the chair over the top turnbuckle. Slamming his face! 1...2...3...4...5...6...7...8...9...10! he just hit Money's face 10 times into the steel chair! Money is down, CWolvie is trying to get unhooked from the Tree of Woe. Hassert is in the ring now with the chair. BOOM! A jabbing blow to CWolvies throat! They are friends, but Hassert wants the gold. Hassert just freed CWolvie. he grabs him by the head. Vertical Suplex... DOWN! Hassert Floats over for the cover, 1...2...Money breaks it up just in time. he hit hassert with an Axe-handle to the head. Money picks up Hassert, and Kicks him in the stomach. Rocker Dropper! cover, 1...2...CWolvie there this time. Cwolvie and Money are both up now, and they are punching each other, going shot for shot. Money irish whip into the ropes, leap frog by Money, and CWolvie just rammed heads with Hassert! They are both down. Money on top with a quick cover, 1...2...NO! They both threw him off. Money is back up though, and he is grabbing the chair, tha tis in the ring still. He runs at CWolvie with it! Back body drop! Over the top and to the floor. Hassert comes in now... Clotheslines CWolvie to the floor too. Hassert rolls to the outside and he grabs Money by the hair. Rams him into the ring post. Money just slumped down to the ground, and Hassert is going over and getting CWolvie now. He Just rammed his head into the pole too. Hassert is now lifting both of them up by the hair. He is going for a double noggin Knocker to the pole! NO! Reversed, and Both men slam his head into the pole! Hassert's head must be dented from the force of that! Cwolvie and Money are now both trying to get the others head into the pole now. No, neither can do it. Money just kicked CWolvie in the groin! DDT! on the floor! Money picks up Hassert and rolls him into the ring. Money has him up... Tigerbomb! he is going for a cover, 1...2...NO! he just got his shoulder up. CWolvie is on the outside still holding his head. Money is picking Hassert up of the ground. Money goes for a huge roundhouse right. Blocked! Into a cross-face by Hassert. Money is screaming in pain! Here comes CWolvie. elbow drop to the back of the head. Hassert is hurting now. CWolvie having a burst of strength. he has Hassert standing... PowerKlaw! He hit his move! 1...2...NO! Money saved himself and Hassert with that one! Money grabs CWolvie. Groin shot! he picks him up, and onto the top turnbuckle. Fall from Grace! Money hit his move! 1...2...NO! Hassert hit Money! This match is never going to end! Hassert is up now, and he has Money... Lethal Injection! cover, 1...2...NO! CWolvie breaks it up this time! Cwolvie is up, and he is irish whipping Hassert into the corner. NO! Reversed, and CWolvie just clotheslined the Ref! his head nearly made it to the 7th row! ref is out. Hassert rolls up CWolvie, There is no ref. Here comes X-Factor. He is in the ring now. he grabs Hassert by the hair... Xtinguisher!
Crumb: Look its Blood Angel! How did he get away from the Police?
Troy: Who cares...look!
Crumb: Blood Angel has CWolvie. Sanguinius Kiss!
Troy: Oh my god! Blood Angel turned on the KULT!
Crumb: And dont forget X-Factor did as well.
Wait, from the crowd! Bleeding Romeo! He has a Wrench in his hands! It is huge. Boom! he just nailed Money X-Factor! Oh he just nailed Money with the wrench as well! And now a shot for Blood Angel! CWolvie is still out from the Kiss... The ref is coming too. CWolvie crawls over and draps an arm on Hassert! Ref starts to Count. Special K! He is here! Without Mrs. D. He slides in the ring, throws Marcus's arm over top of Hassert, and slides right out. No one saw, 1...2...3! Ref now sees that Money and CWolvie both pinned Hassert. he doesn't know what to do.
Troy: I guess we have two winners. Special K is dragging an unconscious Marcus Goldstein back to the dressing room, and Hassert and CWolvie are still pretty much down in the ring.
Crumb: Here comes Prez Kellen again. Wonder what he is going to say. Once again, he has the stick.
Kellen: Well, it seems we have TWO winners, but we can only have one number 1 contender. Guess what everybody, on Wednesday Armageddon, we are going to do it all over again. Money marcus Goldstein vs. CWolvie for the Number 1 contendership, and there HAS to be a WINNER!
Troy: Well there you have it. Kellen's word is final so the Main event on Wednesday will be CWolvie v Goldstein, plus we will have plenty of other great matches.
Crumb: Insane Asylum wont be done.
Troy: Well Crumb we're outta time. For Bald Crumb and myself this was UWF's Sunday Senseless Violence and we'll see you at Armageddon!!!
(Camera fades to black)
WEDNESDAY ARMAGEDON CARD